I wash windows.
…But that’s not all I do.
For over twenty years, I have been a guy who works with his hands and his body to make money. When I was fifteen, my dad lost his “day job” and became a janitor. This instantly became a family business as we all struggled to make ends meet, so most nights (and weekends, and early mornings), the whole Wetmore family could be found emptying trash cans, vacuuming floors, cleaning toilets, washing windows (poorly).
My folks made it clear to me that there would be no money for college. All the savings was needed to keep my family afloat during those first few months when my dad was building his janitorial company. So, epiphany! I decided to join the Army, jump out of airplanes, and blow shit up. Six months later, I was a bonafide Army Ranger.
This was a fun job, but I quickly noticed that I was quite different than the other Rangers in my platoon: where they became known for their skill with a rifle, or their max pushup score, or their ability to run a five-minute mile, I became known for my ability to imitate my platoon sergeant. On deployments, when there was nothing else to do, I would be asked to stand in front of my company of barrel-chested freedom fighters and…do skits.
I was known for being funny. In the Army Rangers.
After my tour, I decided to get out of the Rangers, and I went back to school to get a degree. I got that degree (business administration), and tried my hand at a sales job, working hard for The Man, selling credit card processing.
A desk job was great for two things: breaking down my body, and making me depressed. I quit.
I had a business administration degree, right? Why not start my own company? And why not do something I already knew how to do? So I bought some rags, a couple ladders, and a long pole (insert dick joke here).
A Guy With A Squeegee was born.
I understand that I will always need to have a manual labor job. It keeps me active, it lets me think, and keeps me away from donuts in the breakroom. However, I really, REALLY like to create stuff. I like drawing, I like making videos, acting, poorly making music, writing. Over the years, I have tried to have two separate personalities: the guy who makes things, and A Guy With A Squeegee. The struggle has been real: I tried to make the video guy never touch the drawing guy never touch the guy who likes to build things never touch the guy who washes windows never touch the guy who tries to write. Stupid marketing phrases like ‘brand confusion’ danced around in my head as I desperately tried to wash windows by day, blog by night, make movies on the weekends.
I have never been more exhausted in my life, and I have abandoned more blogs than I care to admit.
Recently, I read a book called The One Thing. Basically, the author challenges you to try to distill down all the shit you have to do into ONE THING that will give you the most bang for your buck.
This new website is my One Thing.
I admit that I am kind of a random guy. Naturally, by owning and operating a window washing company, I think about ways to improve the business quite a bit. I think of window washing ads, funny cartoons, ways to make my company stand out. But I also think about cool stories, drawings I want to do, things I want to put in a screenplay. These are the two halves to me – the guy who works with his hands but desperately needs to create things in order to feel complete.
So, no more trying to operate 4 different websites, with different messages, color schemes, email lists.
From here on out, I am Denny Wetmore. I am A Guy With A Squeegee, and A Guy Who Likes to Make Things. It will have all kinds of shit:
- Window washing videos
- Window Washing Ads
- Excerpts from stories I’m writing
- Random drawings as I attempt to get better (I did the sketch up top)
- Long-form blog posts, which will hopefully get better and less rambling than this one
- Things I’ve built, which help me wash windows
- Tips for washing windows, because it’s a skill that you can learn
…and I promise there will be more random shit. Just like my window washing company, my personality will be front and center.
…just don’t ask me to dress up in camouflage and reenact my platoon sergeant taking a dump, ok?